Tick Tock…Tick Tock…Hmm? What IS that sound? I’m trying to ignore it. I don’t have an analogue clock anywhere in sight.
Tick Tock…Tick Tock. Goodness me…I’ve just had a revelation! Is that maybe my inner biological clock that’s ticking…Oh my hat! Have I reached this stage already?!!!
Jeepers Creepers! I wanna head for the hills – but the hills are lonely and there are no suitable male partners there…hmmm… Not a good idea.
Rethinking mode. Where to go? What to do? I know. I’ll head to my dream homeland, Spain and get myself impregnated by a handsome Andulasian guitarist called Juan Pablo? No no…don’t want a struggling artist again!
Come on Nu, you need more options…everybody else around you is either pregnant, “a smug happily-married couple with kids” or on the verge of becoming “a smug happily-married couple with kids”.
Am I the odd one out? – The last (wo)man standing?!!!
To think I was on such a good way – of course that was before the man who from this day on will only be referred to as the “X -factor”, decided to reveal himself as a “not such a nice guy”, left me hanging on for dear life – alone and cold in an apartment that somewhat resembled the home we once used to share. A place robbed of it warmth, its vitality and definitely no longer a place where one would want to raise a child!
Just the other day, 2 of my closest friends announced their pregnancies to me…and hey, I LOVE these women…they are the closest thing to real family one can ever know. So naturally I am ecstatically happy for them!
But a huge part of me also felt really sad – its the definite realisation that I’m getting older. The realisation that the times of crazy all-night parties or simply packing up and going on a sponateous holiday are coming to an end. We will no longer be the “girls” like we used to be. At least for those who’ll have kids – they’ll never have that 100% carefree attitude again, is’nt it?
Our conversations will turn from talk about finding the right man or “Did you see what SHE had on?” to talk of morning-sickness, baptisms, to “Oh my little one did this, and my little one did that”, to summer camp and the difficulty in finding suitable kindergardens.
But you know what? I look forward to growing older, to “developing” – to moving on…Hell, we’ve partied enough:-)…and the “girly nights” as we once knew them will simply turn into “mommys nights”:-)
Yet another step in my “whole Nu world”!
Follow me – Feel me – Love Me …